Grief is personal. Grief is isolating. But it doesn’t have to be experienced alone. Join a community of grievers who “get it.”
Read More
Even in grief, we must learn to let go. Not of the love for our people (that will always remain). But the previous version of our life. The previous version of what we thought our life would look like.
Read More
In honor of National Grief Awareness Day, I’m sharing 10 things I wish more people knew about grief.
Read More
But letting go is hard - and oftentimes comes with grief and sadness and guilt. It’s also another loss. Another reminder that life has shifted so profoundly. So instead of letting go, maybe we need to be better at letting it flow.
Read More
When Brad first died, self-love involved alcohol and weed. I’m not proud of it, but it felt like the only way I could love myself was by numbing my feelings.
Read More
There is a difference between showing up and being seen. A difference between sympathizing and empathizing. A difference between being understanding and feeling understood. And sometimes, the only people who get it are those who have been through it.
Read More
The truth is, that diagnosis would have inevitably changed us both. The fears, the surgeries, the emergency room visits, the bad news, bad news, bad news. Had Brad survived, our entire trajectory would have shifted - a rocketship midflight, aiming for the moon instead of mars.
Read More
When a person dies, it’s hard to know what to do on big grief dates. Both on anniversaries of positive dates - like weddings and birthdays, as well as anniversaries of the tougher dates - like diagnoses and deaths.
Is a celebration appropriate? Is it better to wallow in bed? Do you involve others or plan a solo day?
Read More
“I miss the old you.”
What they meant was the “fun” me. The “light” me. The “easy going” me. The me that smiled widely and laughed freely and stayed late at the party.
Read More
I feel guilty sharing my joy.
Because I remember how hard it was to see people’s joy early in my own grief. Back when I actually thought I might die from sadness and I couldn’t possibly understand how the rest of the world was getting out of bed, let alone enjoying their lives.
What I needed was for someone to come sit with me in my home because leaving - even for a few hours - required effort I was too exhausted to make. What I needed was someone to come sit with him so I could run to the grocery store or the pharmacy or to just have 10 minutes to sit alone in the car and cry.
Read More
We talk a lot about what not to say to someone grieving. But earlier this week, someone asked me for some helpful things to actually say. Here is a list from the experts…
Read More
After that, we thought we were done stepping in shit. We assumed the universe worked in a way that rewarded good people by avoiding future shit.
But then Brad got cancer (shit) and died (ultimate shit).
Read More
As a widow, did you experience financial instability? Did you receive life insurance? In this episode of Grief Chats, we talk about all things money and widowhood.
Read More
I didn’t understand then why I craved other people’s stories of grief. It felt wrong to want the dark moments. But what I know now is that it wasn’t just about being a voyeur into someone else’s tragedy. It was about holding space for someone else’s pain and then, ultimately, feeling less alone in my own.
Read More
Birthdays are strange days for those of us who have experienced profound loss. They are filled with this duality of deep sadness over the absence of a loved one and also deep gratitude over the privilege to live another year. Celebrating another trip around the sun, while the person we lost remains frozen in time.
Read More
I sat crosslegged on the floor of the loft. The loft that used to be ours but now was just mine. It was empty, except for the beer can that sat in front of me and the disco ball in the corner. But even in its emptiness, the space felt so very full by the life that was lived within those four walls.
Read More
How do you know whether or not you should move? Is it a practical or emotional decision? Do you leave just your home or the city completely? In this episode, we talk about all the complexities of whether or not to move.
Read More