Grief Blog — Forced Joy Project

This is Grief

This is grief. What is happening in our world. In our communities. In our homes.⁣ It’s called grief.⁣

Collectively, we are mourning the loss of our planned future while at the same time, being isolated from the community we need.

Dana FrostApril 8, 2020grief, loss, covid-19, coronavirus, grief resourcesComment

Quarantined Joy

As we spend more time “social distancing” ourselves or self quarantining, it can be difficult to find the joy (especially if you’re sick, alone, or just experiencing an extreme case of cabin fever). But lucky for you, as a homebody, an introvert, and griever, I’ve spent YEARS practicing social distancing and am here to help!

Need some #forcedjoy ideas while stuck in your house alone? Here are some of my favorite ways to spend my time at home.

Dana FrostMarch 16, 2020Joy, quarantine, covid-19, coronavirus, isolationComment

Goodbye, Dad

In some capacity we’ve been preparing for my dad’s death for years - too many close calls and brushes with fate. But nothing prepares you for the actual day of losing a parent. And in the early morning hours yesterday, my tough and stubborn dad, Harvey Miles, finally succumbed.

Dana FrostFebruary 2, 2020Grief, loss, parent loss, cancer, deathComment

10 Lessons Learned Over the Past Decade

2020. A new decade. A fresh start. A clean slate.

But in order to move forward with intention, first I’m reflecting back. I’m looking back at my experiences, my growth, and my mistakes. And when I reflect back on the last 10 years, I see a decade full of richness, depth, and adventures. But I also see a decade full of incomprehensible pain and heartache.

Dana FrostDecember 31, 2019Moving Forward, Widowhood, widow, lessons learned, life lessonsComment

How to Survive the Holidays

And I’m learning it’s not just for those who have been visited by the Grim Reaper instead of Jolly St. Nick. Holidays are hard for a lot of us. Whether you’ve lost someone, or you’re struggling with your mental or physical health, or everything in your life appears perfect but you just don’t feel the joy, it can be difficult to cope during the holidays.

Dana FrostDecember 13, 2019Holidays, Grief, loss, Widowhood, widow, boundaries, deathComment

Ho-Ho-Holidays?

Holidays. ’Tis the season to be jolly, right? The season of parties for hosting, marshmallows for toasting and caroling out in the snow?

But sometimes, the holidays aren't always merry and bright. Sometimes, I feel less like decking the halls and more like Grandma got run over by a reindeer.

Dana FrostDecember 4, 2019Grief, Holidays, loss, Widowhood, widow, cancer, joy Comments

Gift Guide for the Grieving

How to you buy a gift for someone who just lost the love of their life? Or a parent who lost a child? Or for someone recently diagnosed with cancer?

You shift the focus of the gift.

You don’t send a gift with the intention of eliminating their grief (you can’t). You send it as a way to say, “I acknowledge what you’re going through, this totally sucks, and I’m here.”

Dana FrostDecember 3, 2019Gift Guide, Holidays, Grief, loss, grief support, grief resourcesComment

I Feel It in My Body

I carry these moments of grief just like I carry these moments of love - they both slow me down and propel me forward. The heaviness of those moments are still there, several years later. But so is a new fortitude. A new strength I didn’t have in previous years.

Dana FrostSeptember 21, 2019Moving Forward, Grief, Widowhood, loss, widow, young widowComment

Chasing Curiosity

I recently listened to this podcast with Elizabeth Gilbert on how instead of chasing passion (something she’s been preaching her entire career), you should be chasing CURIOSITY instead. And let me tell you, this spoke - so deeply and so profoundly - to my soul.

Dana FrostMay 21, 2019Joy, Moving Forward, passion, elizabeth gilbert Comment

“Did He Smoke?” And Other Things Not to Say to a Grieving Widow

I had zero interest in sharing the most affecting part of my life with this stranger, but I must admit, I did respect his complete drunken disregard for platitudes and his desire to jump straight to the juicy details.

“Cancer,” I replied, leaning away.

Dana FrostMay 14, 2019Grief, Cancer, Widowhood, widow, young widow, grief support, grief guide Comment

Running Away

I recently had a conversation with a friend who had lost his wife last year. He asked me about my experience “running away” and when looking back if it had ended up being the right choice for me. He was craving something similar but, understandably, scared to make a move.

Dana FrostApril 30, 2019Widowhood, widow, young widow, grief, loss, grief supportComment

Fear of Our Own Power

I’ve been having a lot of conversations about power - specifically the internal power we all possess. As I dream up future plans and ambitions for the Forced Joy Project (and subsequently ask myself why I am not doing more to chase those dreams), a wise woman recently told me that we are more afraid of our own power than of the possibility of failure.

Dana FrostFebruary 12, 2019Joy, Moving Forward, Grief, lossComment

You Must Go On

For two years I’ve had this Samuel Beckett quote at the top of my notes. Each morning, as I began my writing for the day, I'd read it and feel the truth of the complexities of loving and losing and living in the aftermath.

Dana FrostJanuary 21, 2019Cancer, Grief, Widowhood, Moving Forward, widow, young widow, grief supportComment

The Fear of Growing Old Alone

Recently I was asked a question by a friend: “how do you handle the fear of growing old alone.” I gave her a quick response and we moved on in our conversation, but the question stuck with me and I wanted to dive a little deeper into that fear - and the complex feelings it brings up.

Dana FrostNovember 7, 2018Grief, Widowhood, Moving Forward, loss, widow, young widow, grief supportComment

10 Year Equinox Anniversary

Today was supposed to be our 10 year wedding anniversary. We were supposed to renew our vows on the beach in Northern Michigan.

Dana FrostSeptember 22, 2018grief, loss, grief support, anniversary, widow, young widow, cancer, cancerversaryComment

Grief and a Wilderness Trek

Earlier this summer, I spent 5 days backcountry camping throughout the Porcupine Mountains in the Upper Peninsula. Over those 5 days, as I struggled with the weight of my pack, the pains, the moments of joy, and the elements, I realized how similar a trek in the wilderness is to the grief journey.

Anchorlight CreativeSeptember 5, 2018grief, loss, widow, cancer, cancer survivor, trek, joy Comments

My Dad, the Roomie

I’ve been struggling with how to write this post for over a week now. Because eventually, when life continues to hand you unbelievable and shockingly shitty situations, you just stop finding the words. You stop finding the energy to even look for the words.

Anchorlight CreativeAugust 2, 2018caregiver, cancer, grief, loss

No One Ever Told Me That Grief Felt So Like Fear

It’s been 18 months since Brad’s death and I still feel full of fear. Grief tends to do that - bring up all kinds of fears, some more rational than others.

Anchorlight CreativeJuly 22, 2018grief, loss, grief guide, widow, Widowhood, young widow

For my most up-to-date writings & thoughts, please check out my substack, I’m Fine (& Other Lies)

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